My boyfriend has a hard time getting and staying hard. It's obviously a difficult situation to talk about, but he says he feels pressure when he's with me (versus previous random hookups he wasn't invested in), so he psyches himself out. When we do have sex, I'm almost always really satisfied and I care a lot about him, both things I express in and outside of the bedroom. But the situation seems to be only getting worse. We've stopped having sex during the week because our busy lives mean we don't have an hour or more to devote to sex (which is sometimes what it takes), or we can't have sex at all because of what he's experiencing. I'm afraid this is going to continue to get worse, not only sexually but emotionally in our relationship. How can I help him fix this, and reassure him in the meantime that I care about him and want to support him?

Psychosocial factors are important in all forms of erectile dysfunction. Careful attention to these issues and attempts to relieve sexual anxieties should be a part of the therapeutic intervention for all patients with erectile dysfunction. Psychotherapy and/or behavioral therapy alone may be helpful for some patients in whom no organic cause of erectile dysfunction is detected. Patients who refuse medical and surgical interventions also may be helped by such counseling. After appropriate evaluation to detect and treat coexistent problems such as issues related to the loss of a partner, dysfunctional relationships, psychotic disorders, or alcohol and drug abuse, psychological treatment focuses on decreasing performance anxiety and distractions and on increasing a couple's intimacy and ability to communicate about sex. Education concerning the factors that create normal sexual response and erectile dysfunction can help a couple cope with sexual difficulties. Working with the sexual partner is useful in improving the outcome of therapy. Psychotherapy and behavioral therapy have been reported to relieve depression and anxiety as well as to improve sexual function. However, outcome data of psychological and behavioral therapy have not been quantified, and evaluation of the success of specific techniques used in these treatments is poorly documented. Studies to validate their efficacy are therefore strongly indicated.

Diet can also affect a man’s ability to achieve or maintain an erection. As stated, men who indulge in alcohol may have trouble with erections, but men who have poor diets, suffer from diabetes, or who are overweight can also restrict blood flow to the penis or suffer from poor body image. All of these factors, especially when combined, can lead to erectile dysfunction.


All NOS subtypes produce NO, but each may play a different biologic role in various tissues. nNOS and eNOS are considered constitutive forms because they share biochemical features: They are calcium-dependent, they require calmodulin and reduced nicotinamide adenine dinucleotide phosphate for catalytic activity, and they are competitively inhibited by arginine derivatives. nNOS is involved in the regulation of neurotransmission, and eNOS is involved in the regulation of blood flow.
Diabetes is a well-recognized risk factor for ED. A systematic review and meta-analysis found that the prevalence of ED was 37.5% in type 1 diabetes, 66.3% in type 2 diabetes, and 52.5% in diabetes overall—a rate approximately 3.5 times higher than that in controls. [39]  The etiology of ED in diabetic men probably involves both vascular and neurogenic mechanisms. Evidence indicates that establishing good glycemic control can minimize this risk.

Surgery to repair arteries (penile arterial reconstructive surgery) can reduce impotence caused by obstructions that block the flow of blood to the penis. The best candidates for such surgery are young men with discrete blockage of an artery because of a physical injury to the pubic area or a fracture of the pelvis. The procedure is less successful in older men with widespread blockage of arteries.
Because of the difficulty in defining the clinical entity of erectile dysfunction, there have been a variety of entry criteria for patients in therapeutic trials. Similarly, the ability to assess efficacy of therapeutic interventions is impaired by the lack of clear and quantifiable criteria of erectile dysfunction. General considerations for treatment follow:
Look, ED can have many causes. Most of the time, it’s physiological. But there are also lots of psychological reasons why someone may experience ED. Treating ED isn’t all about medication. Dealing with some of these psychological issues can help you battle ED, too. I’m talking about depression, anxiety, loss of desire, sense of inadequacy, guilt, fatigue, anger, relationship dysfunction. Working through these types of psychological challenges can help you achieve the happy, healthy manhood you deserve.
Some may use alcohol as a way to get into the mood and overcome some of the nerves associated with having sex, but too much of a good thing can actually backfire. In fact, having a long history of alcohol abuse may lead to long-term erectile dysfunction. As many as 70 percent of men with chronic erectile dysfunction also have a history of alcohol abuse.
Another potential new treatment consists of penile low-intensity shock wave lithotripsy. This consists of 1500 shocks twice a week for 3–6 weeks. The purpose is to stimulate neovascularisation to the corporal bodies with improvement in penile blood flow and endothelial function. The use of low-intensity shock wave lithotripsy may convert PDE5 inhibitor non-responders to responders.47
Psychological causes include depression, stress and anxiety. Men sometimes worry about getting a new sexual partner pregnant so do make sure you mention contraception. If the relationship is relatively new your partner might be nervous about ‘performing’. If they don’t manage to get an erection, this can add to the tension and pressure the next time and further compound the issue.
Concerns that use of pornography can cause erectile dysfunction[14] have not been substantiated in epidemiological studies according to a 2015 literature review.[15] However, another review and case studies article maintains that use of pornography does indeed cause erectile dysfunction, and critiques the previously described literature review.[16]
When we say it’s a barometer of men’s health, it’s a signal. It’s an indicator that things may be right or not. And so when a man develops an erectile problem– and we’re talking about something that is occurring over time. It’s not something that just occurred overnight. When it occurs overnight, it’s more often than not a psychogenic, an anxiety reaction.
Since you’re the talker, this is an argument that you’re going to have to win. Really let him know that you feel insecure and unloved when he doesn’t say “I love you.” Tell him it makes you worry about how he really feels when he doesn’t say anything. Tell him that it hurts you that he won’t step the slightest bit out of his comfort zone to say three words that would make you feel so much better. Let him know this doesn’t mean he has to suddenly get all lovey-dovey and give you a cheesy nickname and lay on the sugar so sweet your teeth rot, you adorable little honeybee — because then you might both puke. (I just threw up a little in my mouth myself while typing that.) But that’s not what you’re asking. Let him know you just want an “I love you” now and then. That’s not unreasonable. He doesn’t have to go overboard and you may not get the constant affirmation you prefer — but you can both compromise.
The appropriate evaluation of all men with erectile dysfunction should include a medical and detailed sexual history (including practices and techniques), a physical examination, a psycho-social evaluation, and basic laboratory studies. When available, a multidisciplinary approach to this evaluation may be desirable. In selected patients, further physiologic or invasive studies may be indicated. A sensitive sexual history, including expectations and motivations, should be obtained from the patient (and sexual partner whenever possible) in an interview conducted by an interested physician or another specially trained professional. A written patient questionnaire may be helpful but is not a substitute for the interview. The sexual history is needed to accurately define the patient's specific complaint and to distinguish between true erectile dysfunction, changes in sexual desire, and orgasmic or ejaculatory disturbances. The patient should be asked specifically about perceptions of his erectile dysfunction, including the nature of onset, frequency, quality, and duration of erections; the presence of nocturnal or morning erections; and his ability to achieve sexual satisfaction. Psychosocial factors related to erectile dysfunction should be probed, including specific situational circumstances, performance anxiety, the nature of sexual relationships, details of current sexual techniques, expectations, motivation for treatment, and the presence of specific discord in the patient's relationship with his sexual partner. The sexual partner's own expectations and perceptions should also be sought since they may have important bearing on diagnosis and treatment recommendations.
Metabolism (breakdown) of vardenafil can be slowed by aging, liver disease, and concurrent use of certain medications (such as erythromycin [an antibiotic], ketoconazole [Nizoral, a medication for fungal/yeast infections], and protease inhibitors [medications used to treat AIDS]). Slowed breakdown allows vardenafil to accumulate in the body and potentially increase the risk for side effects. Therefore, in men over 65 years of age with liver disease, or who are also taking medication(s) that can slow the breakdown of vardenafil, the doctor will initiate vardenafil at low doses to avoid its accumulation. For example,
A rigid or nearly rigid erectile response to intracavernous injection of pharmacologic test doses of a vasodilating agent (see below) indicates adequate arterial and veno-occlusive function. This suggests that the patient may be a suitable candidate for a trial of penile injection therapy. Genital stimulation may be of use in increasing the erectile response in this setting. This diagnostic technique also may be used to differentiate a vascular from a primarily neuropathic or psychogenic etiology. Patients who have an inadequate response to intracavernous pharmacologic injection may be candidates for further vascular testing. It should be recognized, however, that failure to respond adequately may not indicate vascular insufficiency but can be caused by patient anxiety or discomfort. The number of patients who may benefit from more extensive vascular testing is small, but includes young men with a history of significant perineal or pelvic trauma, who may have anatomic arterial blockage (either alone or with neurologic deficit) to account for erectile dysfunction.

The first stem cell study for the treatment of ED was published in 2004. This study used embryonic stem cells to treat ED. At this time, there is a total of 36 published basic studies assessing stem cell therapy for ED, with two clinical trials. The mechanism of action of stem cells is to generate angiogenesis with subsequent increase in cavernosal smooth muscle cells within the corporal bodies.46

Appallingly little is known about the prevalence of erectile dysfunction in the United States and how this prevalence varies according to individual characteristics (age, race, ethnicity, socioeconomic status, and concomitant diseases and conditions). Data on erectile dysfunction available from the 1940's applied to the present U.S. male population produce an estimate of erectile dysfunction prevalence of 7 million.
The role of the endothelium in erectile function became clearer with the observation that the phosphodiesterase type 5 (PDE5) inhibitor, sildenafil, enhanced erectile function. Erection occurs with the release of nitric oxide (NO) from the vascular endothelial cells.17 The reduction in endothelial cell production of NO results in the negative impact on the smooth muscles in the corporal bodies and results in less relaxation of the smooth muscle cells with decrease in blood supply and resulting ED. A similar phenomenon is well known to impact the coronary arterial system resulting in CVD.
Yeah, because in some cases, things had settled down after the guy couldn't get it up any longer and the wife might even have been relieved. Typically, at the stage of life when ED hits, many women are in menopause and have vaginal dryness and pain, which could especially be a problem after a long period of no intercourse because of the guy's ED. And so when he suddenly wants to have intercourse like a 20-year-old every day after taking Viagra, it's the last thing the wife wanted. Or as has happened in some cases, the wife thinks the erection is "fake" -- it's just "chemical" and doesn't really represent his attraction for her. Any excuse to avoid vaginal pain and dryness problems, if not just plain disinterest in sex.

ED usually has something physical behind it, particularly in older men. But psychological factors can be a factor in many cases of ED. Experts say stress, depression, poor self-esteem, and performance anxiety can short-circuit the process that leads to an erection. These factors can also make the problem worse in men whose ED stems from something physical.

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