Your boyfriend is having a pretty normal problem but because guys are so insecure, they almost never talk about it. That silence often makes guys, especially young guys, panicky — like they’re the only ones in the world dealing with this problem. That freaks them out even more, and that anxiety feeds on itself in a fairly classic and unfortunately common pattern: When a guy has trouble getting it up, he gets so down that the impotence gets worse before it gets better. Anxiety-driven impotence can be a vicious cycle: Quite unlike his dick, the problem just grows and grows.

Stanley A Brosman, MD is a member of the following medical societies: Alpha Omega Alpha, American Academy of Pediatrics, American Association for the Advancement of Science, American Association for Cancer Research, American College of Surgeons, American Medical Association, American Urological Association, Society for Basic Urologic Research, Society of Surgical Oncology, Society of Urologic Oncology, Western Section of the American Urological Association, Association of Clinical Research Professionals, American Society of Clinical Oncology, International Society of Urology, International Society of Urological Pathology


Watts and coworkers, in their review article, make several points about this ED/CAD nexus. Endothelial dysfunction is present in both CVD and ED, and is linked through the NO mechanism. The authors note that PDE5 inhibitors improve endothelial function and have a salutary effect on both CVD and ED. Both ED and cardiac disease respond to modifications in lifestyle as well as pharmacologic manipulation. These authors also report that the presence of ED gives the clinician an opportunity to assess CVD and prevention as well.20


Although not proven, it is likely that erectile dysfunction can be prevented by good general health, paying particular attention to body weight, exercise, and cigarette smoking. For example, heart disease and diabetes are problems that can cause erectile dysfunction, and both are preventable through lifestyle changes such as sensible eating and regular exercise. Furthermore, early diagnosis and treatment of associated conditions like diabetes, hypertension and high cholesterol may prevent or delay erectile dysfunction, or stop the erectile dysfunction from getting more serious.
Impotence, or erectile dysfunction, is the inability of a male to attain and keep an erection sufficiently firm to engage in or complete sexual intercourse. Although it is more common in older men, impotence can occur at any age. Impotence is not a normal consequence of aging. About 70% of erectile dysfunction is due to diseases such as diabetes and atherosclerosis, another 10% to 20% is due to psychological factors, and the remaining percentage is related to medications, lifestyle factors, and injury (Source: NIDDK).
The user should stop using the vacuum pump if pain occurs... Use of a vacuum pump may bruise or rupture the blood vessels either immediately below the surface of the skin or within the deep structures of the penis or scrotum, resulting in hemorrhage and/or the formation of a hematoma. There is now sufficient information available regarding the risks, benefits, and use of vacuum pumps.

Impotence: A common problem among men characterized by the consistent inability to sustain an erection sufficient for sexual intercourse or the inability to achieve ejaculation, or both. Impotence can vary. It can involve a total inability to achieve an erection or ejaculation, an inconsistent ability to do so, or a tendency to sustain only very brief erections.
Stiffy Solution: Luckily, alcohol-induced impotence (also known by the infinitely less classy alias "whiskey d*ck") is a totally temporary condition, one that should clear up as soon as your dude can once again walk a straight line and recite the alphabet backwards. If your dude has consistent erectile problems from consistently drinking too much, however, he should consider cutting down on the sauce, and possibly talking with a doctor.
Dr. Matthew Walvick, D.O. is a board certified Internal Medicine physician. He completed his undergraduate education at UCLA. He received his medical degree from Touro University College of Osteopathic Medicine in Vallejo, California. He completed his Internal Medicine residency at UCSF's Fresno Medical Education Program. Prior to joining Lemonaid Health, Dr. Walvick was a practicing primary care physician at John Muir Health and then doing house calls with the start-up Heal. Dr. Walvick is excited to be a part of the Lemonaid Health team making healthcare refreshingly simple.
Penile blood flow is measured using a Doppler probe and a 2.5 cm blood pressure cuff. Systolic pressures in the right and left corpora cavernosa are measured and the penile–brachial index is calculated taking a ratio of penile systolic pressure to brachial systolic pressure. These measures should be repeated before and after 3 minutes of exercising the pelvic and leg muscles. In normal men, the PBI should be 0.9 or greater. Ratios between 0.7 and 0.9 suggest vascular impotence; a ratio below 0.6 is diagnostic. Pelvic arteriography can be done if revascularization is considered.
Alteration of NO levels is the focus of several approaches to the treatment of ED. Inhibitors of phosphodiesterase, which primarily hydrolyze cGMP type 5, provided the basis for the development of the PDE5 inhibitors. Chen et al administered oral L-arginine and reported subjective improvement in 50 men with ED. [14] These supplements are readily available commercially. Reported adverse effects include nausea, diarrhea, headache, flushing, numbness, and hypotension.

The 1985 National Ambulatory Medical Care Survey indicated that there were about 525,000 visits for erectile dysfunction, accounting for 0.2 percent of all male ambulatory care visits. Estimates of visits per 1,000 population increased from about 1.5 for the age group 25-34 to 15.0 for those age 65 and above. The 1985 National Hospital Discharge Survey estimated that more than 30,000 hospital admissions were for erectile dysfunction.
The prostaglandin E1 is contained in a small suppository located at the tip of an applicator. You should urinate first as this lubricates the urethra and makes it easier to insert the applicator into the tip of the urethra (urethral meatus, the opening at the tip of the penis that urine passes through). A patient can release the suppository into urethra by gently wiggling the applicator and pressing the button at the end. Rubbing the penis allows the suppository to dissolve, and the prostaglandin is absorbed through the tissue of the urethra into the penis. It takes 15 to 30 minutes for this occur. Once into the penis, the prostaglandin causes increased blood flow into the penis. The prostaglandin can be present in the ejaculate, and thus doctors recommend that men use a condom when having intercourse with a pregnant partner. Men may need to use a condom if vaginal irritation occurs in female partner.
If surgical intervention is an acceptable option, the work-up then proceeds with a noctural penile tumescense (NPT) test, the single most valuable study to establish the diagnosis of organic impotence. The NPT test exploits the fact that males from birth to old age normally have erections during rapid eye movement (REM) sleep. Psychogenic impotence is associated with normal erections during sleep. In organic impotence there should be no evidence of erection or, if erections are present, they should be limited and poorly sustained.
If you just got off solo, you might have to wait before you can hop into bed with your partner, says Dr. Brahmbhatt. It might have something to do with a spike in the hormone prolactin after you orgasm, according to a study published in the International Journal of Impotence Research. This hormone has been linked to difficulties maintaining an erection or even ejaculating.
Conditions that may be associated with ED include diabetes, [25, 26, 27] hypertension, [28] , and CAD, as well as neurologic disorders, endocrinopathies, benign prostatic hyperplasia, [29] , sleep apnea [30] , COPD, [31] and depression (see Table 1 below). [32, 33, 34, 35] In fact, almost any disease may affect erectile function by altering the nervous, vascular, or hormonal systems. Various diseases may produce changes in the smooth muscle tissue of the corpora cavernosa or influence the patient’s psychological mood and behavior.
I always made sure to satisfy my woman first, from the start of our marriage. When I started having issues with ED a few years ago, I talked to her about it and asked for her to be understanding and also that I needed a lot of the things sexually that she had not really given me much of, regardless of how much pampering or pleasing I did for her. She agreed, but never really stepped it up despite me talking to her about it every few weeks trying to salvage my own interest in sex. I had chased her constantly for over 10 years, then after the psychological effects of ED took their toll and she never really followed through helping me, my sex drive just tanked. I stopped chasing her, then after a little while she slowly started wanting it enough to initiate. Even then, she still wants the same sex as before, without the things I want being a regular part of it. My sex drive is still very low, and I still make an effort, but I can tell that my interest in sex is just deteriorating every time I have an ED episode and feel my desires being neglected. Each time, it just makes me less interested in continuing to try "serve" her because she does not return the favor much. The idea of spending so much effort doing "other stuff" while my wants and desires are barely recognized makes sex sound as exciting as mowing the yard to me now days.
Stop trying to force the erection - it’s not possible to give yourself an erection just by trying hard enough, if it were then you wouldn’t be reading this. An erection is known as an ‘unconscious response’, meaning you can’t control it by thinking about it. In fact focusing on your erection too much is more likely to block it, so try instead to focus something else, such as:
It is estimated that up to 20 million American men frequently suffer from impotence and that it strikes up to half of all men between the ages of 40 and 70. Doctors used to think that most cases of impotence were psychological in origin, but they now recognize that, at least in older men, physical causes may play a primary role in 60% or more of all cases. In men over the age of 60, the leading cause is atherosclerosis, or narrowing of the arteries, which can restrict the flow of blood to the penis. Injury or disease of the connective tissue, such as Peyronie's disease, may prevent the corpora cavernosa from completely expanding. Damage to the nerves of the penis, from certain types of surgery or neurological conditions, such as Parkinson's disease or multiple sclerosis, may also cause impotence. Men with diabetes are especially at risk for impotence because of their high risk of both atherosclerosis and a nerve disease called diabetic neuropathy.
One report from a recent community survey concluded that erectile failure was the leading complaint of males attending sex therapy clinics. Other studies have shown that erectile disorders are the primary concern of sex therapy patients in treatment. This is consistent with the view that erectile dysfunction may be associated with depression, loss of self-esteem, poor self-image, increased anxiety or tension with one's sexual partner, and/or fear and anxiety associated with contracting sexually transmitted diseases, including AIDS.
The vacuum device creates a vacuum to pull blood into the penis. Unlike a normal erection, the inflow of blood does not continue once the individual removes the vacuum device. The rubber band placed at the base of the penis constricts the penis to prevent the blood from leaving the penis. As there is no inflow or outflow of blood when the rubber band is in place, it is uncommon for the tip of the penis (the glans) to appear a little blue and the penis to be cooler. Once intercourse is completed, the individual removes the rubber band and the blood drains out of the penis.

Besides treating the underlying causes such as potassium deficiency or arsenic contamination of drinking water, the first line treatment of erectile dysfunction consists of a trial of PDE5 inhibitor (such as sildenafil). In some cases, treatment can involve prostaglandin tablets in the urethra, injections into the penis, a penile prosthesis, a penis pump or vascular reconstructive surgery.[1]
#9 Smokers hell. Bad stimulants such as smoking cigarettes may be having a negative impact on more than just your lungs. That’s right, smoking may lead to a lazy penis. One study shows that 40% of men that suffer from erectile dysfunction are smokers. The good news is that 75% of men reported erectile issues disappear after quitting smoking. What better motivation to quit smoking than having amazing sex? [Read: How to keep an erection up for longer in 20 ways]
Stiffy Solution: Luckily, alcohol-induced impotence (also known by the infinitely less classy alias "whiskey d*ck") is a totally temporary condition, one that should clear up as soon as your dude can once again walk a straight line and recite the alphabet backwards. If your dude has consistent erectile problems from consistently drinking too much, however, he should consider cutting down on the sauce, and possibly talking with a doctor.
For many men, stopping smoking is an erectile dysfunction remedy, particularly when ED is the result of vascular disease, which occurs when blood supply to the penis becomes restricted because of blockage or narrowing of the arteries. Smoking and even smokeless tobacco can also cause the narrowing of important blood vessels and have the same negative impact. 
Circulatory problems: An erection occurs when the penis fills with blood and a valve at the base of the penis traps it. Diabetes, high blood pressure, cholesterol, clots, and atherosclerosis (hardening of the arteries) can all interfere with this process. Such circulatory problems are the number one cause of erectile dysfunction. Frequently, erectile dysfunction is the first noticeable symptom of cardiovascular disease.
To a significant degree, the public, particularly older men, is conditioned to accept erectile dysfunction as a condition of progressive aging for which little can be done. In addition, there is considerable inaccurate public information regarding sexual function and dysfunction. Often, this is in the form of advertisements in which enticing promises are made, and patients then become even more demoralized when promised benefits fail to materialize. Accurate information on sexual function and the management of dysfunction must be provided to affected men and their partners. They also must be encouraged to seek professional help, and providers must be aware of the embarrassment and/or discouragement that may often be reasons why men with erectile dysfunction avoid seeking appropriate treatment.
ED is often the result of atherosclerosis, and as a result, men with ED frequently have cardiovascular disease. Sexual activity is associated with increased physical exertion, which in some men may increase the risk of having a heart attack (myocardial infarction or MI). The major risk factors associated with cardiovascular disease are age, hypertension, diabetes mellitus, obesity, smoking, abnormal lipid/cholesterol levels in the blood, and lack of exercise. Individuals with three or more of these risk factors are at increased risk for a heart attack during sexual activity. The Princeton Consensus Panel developed guidelines for treating ED in men with cardiovascular disease. Thus, if you have ED and cardiovascular disease (for example, angina or prior heart attack), you should discuss whether or not treatment of ED and sexual activity are appropriate for you.
3. Are there physical causes of erectile dysfunction? Erectile dysfunction may be a symptom of underlying medical conditions, which if not detected may cause further medical problems. A prior history of cigarette smoking, heart attacks, strokes, and poor circulation in the extremities (for example, intermittent claudication or cramping in your leg[s] when you walk) suggest atherosclerosis as the cause of the erectile dysfunction. Loss of sexual desire and drive, lack of sexual fantasies, gynecomastia (enlargement of breasts), and diminished facial hair suggest low testosterone levels. A prior history of pelvic surgery or radiation and trauma to the penis/pelvis/perineum can cause problems with the nerves and blood vessels. Symptoms of intermittent claudication of the lower extremities with exercise may suggest a vascular problem as a cause of the erectile dysfunction.
Obviously, there are worse problems than a guy saying "I love you" too often, but if it's a problem, it sounds like the two of you need to have a long conversation. You need to understand why he likes to say it so much: Is it because he's insecure or hoping to comfort you or just breathlessly in love? (Or some combination of the three?) And he needs to understand how it makes you feel. So, if it really bothers you, tell him why.

So not only are erectile problems common, they're nothing for you or your special friend to be freaked out about. Check out the nine most common reasons that dudes sometimes can't get it up, and get ready to become the soothing voice of reason the next time the guy you're with has a hard time pitching his tent in your happy valley. Everything (and every penis) is gonna be fine!

A vacuum erection device helps draw blood into the penis by applying negative pressure. This type of device is sometimes referred to as penis pump and may be used just prior to sexual intercourse. Several types of FDA approved vacuum therapy devices are available with a doctor's prescription. When pharmacological methods fail, a purpose-designed external vacuum pump can be used to attain erection, with a separate compression ring fitted to the penis to maintain it. These pumps should be distinguished from other penis pumps (supplied without compression rings) which, rather than being used for temporary treatment of impotence, are claimed to increase penis length if used frequently, or vibrate as an aid to masturbation. More drastically, inflatable or rigid penile implants may be fitted surgically.
Radical prostatectomy for the treatment of prostate cancer poses a significant risk of ED. A number of factors are associated with the chance of preserving erectile function. If both nerves that course on the lateral edges of the prostate can be saved, the chance of maintaining erectile function is reasonable. The odds depend on the age of the patient. Men younger than 60 years have a 75-80% chance of preserving potency, but men older than 70 years have only a 10-15% chance.
Most bouts of ED can be explained away by stress, anxiety, or nervousness. If erectile dysfunction becomes frequent, don’t panic, but cover your bases by seeing a doctor to rule out scarier causes like diabetes or prostate cancer. Medications like antidepressants can also cause boner loss. Unless you can’t get it up after a date because you spent the day snorting coke and fucking your ex (in which case figure some shit out before you see other people) this line places the blame on the stress of work and away from your partner. While a woman will usually be understanding, she may fear you can’t get hard because you’re not attracted to her. Ease these anxieties with this line. Even if work was great and you’re having trouble getting it up because of other stress, like a text from an ex or family shit you’re not ready to disclose, I’ll allow a little white lie in this instance.
Stanley A Brosman, MD is a member of the following medical societies: Alpha Omega Alpha, American Academy of Pediatrics, American Association for the Advancement of Science, American Association for Cancer Research, American College of Surgeons, American Medical Association, American Urological Association, Society for Basic Urologic Research, Society of Surgical Oncology, Society of Urologic Oncology, Western Section of the American Urological Association, Association of Clinical Research Professionals, American Society of Clinical Oncology, International Society of Urology, International Society of Urological Pathology
You get to decide what is normal for you. That might include him still experiencing pleasure from you touching his penis even if he’s not hard. Some men can still orgasm without an erection. Or he may prefer not to have any touching while he is dealing with his erection problems. It is okay for you to orgasm even if he doesn’t. Reading about what might bring you pleasure, or considering how you think about sex can make this something enjoyable to explore together.

Risks associated with injection therapy including bleeding, pain with injection, penile pain, priapism, and corporal fibrosis (scarring inside of the corpora cavernosa). There is also concern that repetitive injections in the same area could cause scar tissue to build up in the tunica albuginea that could create penile curvature. Thus, doctors recommended that one alternate sides with injection and perform injections no more frequent than every other day.
By contrast, psychogenic impotence typically is abrupt in onset, often in relation to psychological trauma, and may wax and wane. Patients with psychogenic impotence may have total erectile failure with one partner but not another, or be impotent during sexual intercourse but not during self-stimulation. Normally occurring spontaneous erections in the morning suggest psychogenic rather than organic causes for impotence.

However, a review of a United Kingdom medical record database found no evidence that the use of 5-alpha reductase inhibitors independently increase the risk for ED. In 71,849 men with benign prostatic hyperplasia (BPH), the risk of ED was not increased with the use of finasteride or dutasteride only (odds ratio [OR] 0.94), or a 5-alpha reductase inhibitor plus an alpha blocker (OR 0.92) compared with an alpha blocker only. In addition, the risk of ED was not increase in 12 346 men prescribed finasteride 1 mg for alopecia, compared with unexposed men with alopecia (OR 0.95). The risk of ED did increase with longer duration of BPH, regardless of drug exposure. [48]
Melissa Conrad Stöppler, MD, is a U.S. board-certified Anatomic Pathologist with subspecialty training in the fields of Experimental and Molecular Pathology. Dr. Stöppler's educational background includes a BA with Highest Distinction from the University of Virginia and an MD from the University of North Carolina. She completed residency training in Anatomic Pathology at Georgetown University followed by subspecialty fellowship training in molecular diagnostics and experimental pathology.
Watts and coworkers, in their review article, make several points about this ED/CAD nexus. Endothelial dysfunction is present in both CVD and ED, and is linked through the NO mechanism. The authors note that PDE5 inhibitors improve endothelial function and have a salutary effect on both CVD and ED. Both ED and cardiac disease respond to modifications in lifestyle as well as pharmacologic manipulation. These authors also report that the presence of ED gives the clinician an opportunity to assess CVD and prevention as well.20
Total testosterone levels: Health care professionals should obtain a patient's blood samples for total testosterone levels in the early morning (before 8 a.m.) because the testosterone levels go up and down throughout the day. If you have a low testosterone level, a health care professional should check it again to confirm that it is truly low. In some men, a specialized test measuring the active form of testosterone (free or bioavailable testosterone) may be recommended.
Psychological factors on their own are estimated to be the cause of 20% of all the cases of erectile dysfunction and account for most of the difficulties in young men. They can also contribute towards its continuation in all age groups where physical causes are the main culprit, but the man’s reaction to what he sees as his “failure” has added a psychological impact.
If you're regularly having trouble getting or maintaining erection and it's not situation specific (for instance, this happens whether you're with a partner or alone or watching porn or whatever), it could be a tip-off to a physiological problem. Diabetes, high cholesterol, high blood pressure, and cardiovascular issues can all present with erectile problems, says Paduch. That's because basically anything affecting your nerves or blood flow can impact your boners.
However, a review of a United Kingdom medical record database found no evidence that the use of 5-alpha reductase inhibitors independently increase the risk for ED. In 71,849 men with benign prostatic hyperplasia (BPH), the risk of ED was not increased with the use of finasteride or dutasteride only (odds ratio [OR] 0.94), or a 5-alpha reductase inhibitor plus an alpha blocker (OR 0.92) compared with an alpha blocker only. In addition, the risk of ED was not increase in 12 346 men prescribed finasteride 1 mg for alopecia, compared with unexposed men with alopecia (OR 0.95). The risk of ED did increase with longer duration of BPH, regardless of drug exposure. [48]

Associated morbidity may include various other male sexual dysfunctions, such as premature (early) ejaculation and male hypoactive sexual desire disorder. The NHSLS found that 28.5% of men aged 18-59 years reported premature ejaculation, and 15.8% lacked sexual interest during the past year. An additional 17% reported anxiety about sexual performance, and 8.1% had a lack of pleasure in sex. [51]
Risks associated with injection therapy including bleeding, pain with injection, penile pain, priapism, and corporal fibrosis (scarring inside of the corpora cavernosa). There is also concern that repetitive injections in the same area could cause scar tissue to build up in the tunica albuginea that could create penile curvature. Thus, doctors recommended that one alternate sides with injection and perform injections no more frequent than every other day.
There are hundreds of medications that have the side effect of ED and/or decreased libido. Examples of drugs implicated as a cause of ED include hydrochlorothiazides and beta-blocking agents. Medications used to treat depression, particularly the SSRIs such as citalopram (Celexa), escitalopram (Lexapro), fluoxetine (Prozac, Prozac Weekly, Sarafem), fluvoxamine (Luvox, Luvox CR), paroxetine (Paxil, Paxil CR, Pexeva) and sertraline (Zoloft), may also contribute to ED.9 Bupropion (Wellbutrin) which has a predominant effect on blocking the reuptake of dopamine is an antidepressant with lower incidence of ED.10 The side effects of 5ARIs occurring in fewer than 5% of patients can include gynaecomastia, ED, loss of libido and ejaculatory dysfunction.11
The common PDE5 inhibitor drugs approved in the United States are sildenafil (Viagra), vardenafil (Levitra and Staxyn, the generic form), tadalafil (Cialis), or avanafil (Stendra). All of the currently approved PDE5 inhibitors work in the same way. They differ in the number of available doses, how quickly they work and last in your system, the dosing, and to some extent in the side effects. However, they generally share the same indications and contraindications. Currently, tadalafil is the only medication that patients can take on a daily basis and is approved for the treatment of both ED and BPH (benign enlargement of the prostate).
Poor sleep patterns can be a contributing factor for erectile dysfunction, Mucher says. One review published in the journal Brain Research emphasized the intricate relationship between the level of sex hormones like testosterone, sexual function, and sleep, noting that testosterone levels increase with improved sleep, and lower levels are associated with sexual dysfunction. Hormone secretion is controlled by the body’s internal clock, and sleep patterns likely help the body determine when to release certain hormones. 
Causes of impotence are many and include heart disease, high cholesterol, high blood pressure, obesity, metabolic syndrome, Parkinson's disease, Peyronie's disease, substance abuse, sleep disorders, BPH treatments, relationship problems, blood vessel diseases (such as peripheral vascular disease and others), systemic disease, hormonal imbalance, and medications (such as blood pressure and heart medications).
One report from a recent community survey concluded that erectile failure was the leading complaint of males attending sex therapy clinics. Other studies have shown that erectile disorders are the primary concern of sex therapy patients in treatment. This is consistent with the view that erectile dysfunction may be associated with depression, loss of self-esteem, poor self-image, increased anxiety or tension with one's sexual partner, and/or fear and anxiety associated with contracting sexually transmitted diseases, including AIDS.
There have been rare reports of priapism (prolonged and painful erections lasting more than six hours) with the use of PDE5 inhibitors such as sildenafil, vardenafil, and tadalafil. Patients with blood cell diseases such as sickle cell anemia, leukemia, and multiple myeloma have higher than normal risks of developing priapism. Untreated priapism can cause injury to the penis and lead to permanent impotence. Therefore, if your erection lasts four hours, you should seek emergency medical care.
My fiancé and I have been together for four years, and while we've had our ups and downs, we're in a good place now and looking forward to our life together. Throughout our relationship, we've made some bad financial decisions. Since I'm the one with the credit cards (his credit is awful), I'm the one that's more affected. We're trying to dig ourselves out of this hole, and he does pay a good portion of the bills, but I recently found out he didn't pay even close to the amount he could have. Meanwhile, I'm basically spending my full paycheck trying to pay off my debts. When I asked about it, he said he didn't just want to "throw all of his money toward it," but that's exactly what I'm doing. Am I wrong to ask him to contribute more? He doesn't spend frivolously or anything, but I feel that we should focus on outstanding balances before trying to save money.
Men, if you can't get an erection and are in a relationship with someone you deeply care about... Please.. Bring on the toys.. bring on the hands.... bring on the tounge.. do SOMETHING... Don't use that as an excuse not to erouse the woman you love. If shes not getting satisfied from you, she will find it somewhere else OR... she will be sad stuck in a relationship STARVING for sex and have pity on you. You can do so much without an erection. That's not the end all be all in orgasms for women. Trust me... You need to over compensate for problem. You can actually appear MORE manly by stepping up and making sure woman is satisfied. Don't let your bed be a graveyard.!!! I am pretty sure you can still have an orgasm without an erection.. if you have the right woman,... pleasure her. Do what it takes to help her orgasm... and then it's your turn. She will make sure you are pleased regardless if you are fully erected or squishy... Don't fret over this.. Seriously...!!! Don't feel like your manhood is any less... Rise up and serve and she will make you happy. Trust me!!
Jump up ^ Reepmeyer JC, Woodruff JT (2007). "Use of liquid chromatography-mass spectrometry and a chemical cleavage reaction for the structure elucidation of a new sildenafil analogue detected as an adulterant in an herbal dietary supplement". Journal of Pharmaceutical and Biomedical Analysis. 44 (4): 887–93. doi:10.1016/j.jpba.2007.04.011. PMID 17532168.

So what can you do to help things along a little?  Well, chances are it may sort itself out as you settle in to your relationship. But if it keeps happening and you see a future in the relationship, you need to talk about it, or it will soon become the elephant in the bedroom. Pick a time with no distractions and where nobody can overhear you. Tell them that you care about them and that you don’t need to rush things sexually. This can take the pressure off the need to perform. 


Normal Male Sexual Ageing is ignored by health care professionals. There is never a clear discussion. The best that happens is that when it happens, instead of Male Sexual Decline being a known factor that should be quantified for each individual male by regular testing and awareness, the health care professional says, "Oh. This is normal.You can do other things and still keep sex enjoyable".
Elise joined Lemonaid because she believes healthcare should be accessible and affordable to everyone! With extensive professional healthcare experience, Elise has spent the last decade as an advocate for the highest quality patient care in specialties like gynecology, internal medicine, and otolaryngology and has excelled in various roles such as office manager, surgery coordinator, and front office coordinator. She feels every patient should be treated with kindness and understanding, and she brings this attitude to work every day. Aside from her medical background, she’s also a professional musician and enjoys living life to the fullest with a smile on her face.
In prescribing sildenafil, a doctor considers the age, general health status, and other medication(s) the patient is taking. The usual starting dose for most men is 50 mg, however, the doctor may increase or decrease the dose depending on side effects and effectiveness. The maximum recommended dose is 100 mg every 24 hours. However, many men will need 100 mg of sildenafil for optimal effectiveness, and some doctors are recommending 100 mg as the starting dose.

After the history, physical examination, and laboratory testing, a clinical impression can be obtained of a primarily psychogenic, organic, or mixed etiology for erectile dysfunction. Patients with primary or associated psychogenic factors may be offered further psychologic evaluation, and patients with endocrine abnormalities may be referred to an endocrinologist to evaluate the possibility of a pituitary lesion or hypogonadism. Unless previously diagnosed, suspicion of neurologic deficit may be further assessed by complete neurologic evaluation. No further diagnostic tests appear necessary for those patients who favor noninvasive treatment (e.g., vacuum constrictive devices, or pharmacologic injection therapy). Patients who do not respond satisfactorily to these noninvasive treatments may be candidates for penile implant surgery or further diagnostic testing for possible additional invasive therapies.
Whenever using any fluid or oil on sensitive areas of your body, it is best to test it out on a small scale first. If there are no problems on the test, try massaging the erection treatment gel into the penis all over until an instant erection is achieved. You should get an erection in a few minutes. When you first begin to use the product, we suggest masturbating with it before using it during sex to become more comfortable with the amount needed and the sensation it produces.

Organic Impotence. Diabetes mellitus, thyroid disease, and dysfunction of the pituitary gland or testes can cause impotence, as can certain medications. Other organic causes include arterial ischemia associated with atherosclerosis of the aorta and common iliac arteries, extensive pelvic surgery such as radical prostatectomy, spinal cord injury and other neurologic disorders, and a history of cigarette smoking. Because certain medications can cause impotence, it is recommended that in cases of recent impotence it be determined whether the patient has started on a new drug. The most common offenders are diuretics, antihypertensives, and vasodilators. Alcohol, which sometimes is ignored as a drug, is often a contributor to the problem of impotence.
Because impotence can be due to health problems that can affect the whole body, and because it can interfere with one’s quality of life, it is important to talk with your doctor if you have trouble attaining or maintaining an erection. With increasing discussion of impotence in the media, coupled with advances in treatment, men are now much more comfortable talking with their doctors about impotence. It is currently estimated that between 15 and 30 million men in the United States are affected by impotence (Source: NIDDK).
Cardiovascular diseases: The most common cause of cardiovascular diseases in the United States is atherosclerosis, the narrowing and hardening of arteries that reduces blood flow. Atherosclerosis (a type of vascular disease) typically affects arteries throughout the body; hypertension, high blood cholesterol levels, cigarette smoking, and diabetes mellitus aggravate atherosclerosis. Hardening of the arteries to the penis and pelvic organs, atherosclerosis, causes insufficient blood flow into the penis. There is a close correlation between the severity of atherosclerosis in the coronary arteries and erectile dysfunction. For example, men with more severe coronary artery atherosclerosis (hardening of the arteries in the heart) also tend to have more erectile dysfunction than men with mild or no coronary artery atherosclerosis. Some doctors suggest that men with new onset erectile dysfunction undergo evaluation for silent coronary artery diseases (advanced coronary artery atherosclerosis that has not yet caused angina or heart attacks).
#9 Smokers hell. Bad stimulants such as smoking cigarettes may be having a negative impact on more than just your lungs. That’s right, smoking may lead to a lazy penis. One study shows that 40% of men that suffer from erectile dysfunction are smokers. The good news is that 75% of men reported erectile issues disappear after quitting smoking. What better motivation to quit smoking than having amazing sex? [Read: How to keep an erection up for longer in 20 ways]
The main medical causes of erectile dysfunction are based around poor blood flow (due to furring of the arteries thanks to raised cholesterol or high blood pressure), poor nerve supply caused by diabetes-related nerve damage, or low testosterone as a result of obesity, old age or failing gonads. We doctors get just as concerned with men who have variable erections as well as those that can't get an erection at all. Failing to get an erection occasionally is pretty normal as you get older. But if you have unreliable erections for a prolonged period of time – more than six months – this could suggest an early sign of physical problems such as cardiovascular disease or diabetes which could develop further so get yourself checked out.
For some patients with an established diagnosis of testicular failure (hypogonadism), androgen replacement therapy may sometimes be effective in improving erectile function. A trial of androgen replacement may be worthwhile in men with low serum testosterone levels if there are no other contraindications. In contrast, for men who have normal testosterone levels, androgen therapy is inappropriate and may carry significant health risks, especially in the situation of unrecognized prostate cancer. If androgen therapy is indicated, it should be given in the form of intramuscular injections of testosterone enanthate or cypionate. Oral androgens, as currently available, are not indicated. For men with hyperprolactinemia, bromocriptine therapy often is effective in normalizing the prolactin level and improving sexual function. A wide variety of other substances taken either orally or topically have been suggested to be effective in treating erectile dysfunction. Most of these have not been subjected to rigorous clinical studies and are not approved for this use by the Food and Drug Administration (FDA). Their use should therefore be discouraged until further evidence in support of their efficacy and indicative of their safety is available.
Your question reminds me of this brilliant Louis CK bit from his special Hilarious, in which he talks about a guy who said his appetizer was amazing. "Really? You were amazed by a basket of chicken wings? What if Jesus comes down from the sky and makes love to you all night long and leaves the new living lord in your belly? What are you going to call that? You used amazing on a basket of chicken wings! You've limited yourself verbally to a shit life."
I am a woman who is currently in menopause. My sex drive has increased and i believe that it can equate to a teenage boy. My s.o. has erection dissatification. He can not penetrate. He prefers oral. He will become erect and orgasm. He works very hard to please me but sometimes I want intercourse. It makes me feel like he isnt attracted to me. I have been with him for quite some time and believe he has always had this problem. I dont understand why. I understand when you say that your wife has no interest. It can be hurtful.
Although women tend to become more around by psychological stimuli, such as fantasies or romance novels, men tend to be more visual creatures, meaning they need to be able to actually see the object of arousal. Obviously, no two people are alike, so this is not a blanket statement, but scientific study after study over the years has shown this to be the norm.
However, men are affected psychologically when it comes to achieving erections. For instance, if a man is with a woman for the first time, or even before he feels comfortable with her, he may suffer from performance anxiety. In such a situation, his mind and body are both saying yes, but then they become out of sync. The body is then saying yes, but the mind is filled with question. “Will I be able to perform?” “How long will I last?” “Am I big enough to satisfy her?” “Is she looking at that mole on my stomach?” All kinds of questions may be going through a man’s mind upon getting in bed, and these can be distracting, they can lead to self-doubt, and therefore, failure to achieve or maintain an erection.
A study published in May 2014 in The Journal of Sexual Medicine found that some men can reverse erectile dysfunction with healthy lifestyle changes, such as exercise, weight loss, a varied diet, and good sleep. The Australian researchers also showed that even if erectile dysfunction medication is required, it's likely to be more effective if you implement these healthy lifestyle changes.

The trouble is, most people don't know that sexual dysfunction can be a warning sign of something more serious. Dr Graham Jackson, a cardiologist and the chairman of the Sexual Advice Association, would like to change that. "People aren't aware of the underlying causes of their problems because they feel well otherwise," he says. "They'll say, 'It's my age' or 'I'm nervous because I'm in a new relationship.' But every man with erectile dysfunction should have their heart and blood pressure checked."

#3 You’re not having enough sex. The more sex you’re having, the less likely you are to suffer from erectile issues. The American Journal of Medicine reports that men who had sex once *or more* a week were less likely to have issues getting and maintaining an erection. So, not having sex is actually one of the reasons you can’t get hard. [Read: 13 ways to have better sex and change the way you make love]
My fiancé and I have been together for four years, and while we've had our ups and downs, we're in a good place now and looking forward to our life together. Throughout our relationship, we've made some bad financial decisions. Since I'm the one with the credit cards (his credit is awful), I'm the one that's more affected. We're trying to dig ourselves out of this hole, and he does pay a good portion of the bills, but I recently found out he didn't pay even close to the amount he could have. Meanwhile, I'm basically spending my full paycheck trying to pay off my debts. When I asked about it, he said he didn't just want to "throw all of his money toward it," but that's exactly what I'm doing. Am I wrong to ask him to contribute more? He doesn't spend frivolously or anything, but I feel that we should focus on outstanding balances before trying to save money.
Another potential new treatment consists of penile low-intensity shock wave lithotripsy. This consists of 1500 shocks twice a week for 3–6 weeks. The purpose is to stimulate neovascularisation to the corporal bodies with improvement in penile blood flow and endothelial function. The use of low-intensity shock wave lithotripsy may convert PDE5 inhibitor non-responders to responders.47
This is one of many types of constricting devices placed at the base of the penis to diminish venous outflow and improve the quality and duration of the erection. This is particularly useful in men who have a venous leak and are only able to obtain partial erections that they are unable to maintain. These constricting devices may be used in conjunction with oral agents, injection therapy, and vacuum devices.
An alprostadil cream that patients apply into the tip of the penis (the urethral meatus, the opening that urine passes through) is currently available in the UK and Europe. It is currently under review by the U.S. Food and Drug Administration (FDA). After application of the cream, an erection occurs within five to 30 minutes, and the erection lasts one to two hours in men who respond to the cream. Doctors recommend that one use the cream for a maximum frequency of two to three times per week and no more frequent than once every 24 hours. It has essentially the same contraindications and side effects as the other formulations of alprostadil. The cream may cause vaginal burning in roughly 4% of partners. Men should not use alprostadil cream for sexual intercourse with women of childbearing potential unless a condom is used. Researchers have performed controlled trial studies to evaluate the safety and effectiveness of this drug. Overall, 52% of men reported improvement in their erections compared to 20% of men receiving placebo. A later analysis demonstrated that 36% of men using the alprostadil cream had a clinically relevant improvement in vaginal penetration ability and 31% clinically relevant improvement in ability to have successful intercourse to ejaculation.
In other cases, men who habitually use alcohol or other drugs may experience similar results. Alcohol is a depressant to the central nervous system. This means that a little bit might be able to lighten the mood, but too much can basically shut down all communication between the brain and the penis. When this happens, no amount of will or stimulation will result in an erection. Other drugs can also affect the body’s ability to achieve an erection, including heroin and MDMA, otherwise known as ecstasy.
Metabolism (breakdown) of vardenafil can be slowed by aging, liver disease, and concurrent use of certain medications (such as erythromycin [an antibiotic], ketoconazole [Nizoral, a medication for fungal/yeast infections], and protease inhibitors [medications used to treat AIDS]). Slowed breakdown allows vardenafil to accumulate in the body and potentially increase the risk for side effects. Therefore, in men over 65 years of age with liver disease, or who are also taking medication(s) that can slow the breakdown of vardenafil, the doctor will initiate vardenafil at low doses to avoid its accumulation. For example,
Stress is your body responding to your environment. And it’s a good thing—in limited doses. When you get stressed out your body makes chemicals like adrenaline that make you stronger, faster, fitter, and even able to think more clearly. Most people call this reaction the “fight-or-flight” response, and it’s a life-saver in dangerous situations. In a very real sense, adrenaline makes you a part-time superhero. The problems happen when your body deals with constant stress.
×