My boyfriend has a hard time getting and staying hard. It's obviously a difficult situation to talk about, but he says he feels pressure when he's with me (versus previous random hookups he wasn't invested in), so he psyches himself out. When we do have sex, I'm almost always really satisfied and I care a lot about him, both things I express in and outside of the bedroom. But the situation seems to be only getting worse. We've stopped having sex during the week because our busy lives mean we don't have an hour or more to devote to sex (which is sometimes what it takes), or we can't have sex at all because of what he's experiencing. I'm afraid this is going to continue to get worse, not only sexually but emotionally in our relationship. How can I help him fix this, and reassure him in the meantime that I care about him and want to support him?


Following a detailed discussion about the history of erectile dysfunction and its risk factors, your doctor will examine the testicles and penis to help determine the cause of erectile dysfunction. Your doctor will check reflexes and pulses in the area to see if problems with blood vessels or nerves are contributing to the erectile dysfunction. If necessary, your doctor will order tests to help diagnose erectile dysfunction.
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Men, if you can't get an erection and are in a relationship with someone you deeply care about... Please.. Bring on the toys.. bring on the hands.... bring on the tounge.. do SOMETHING... Don't use that as an excuse not to erouse the woman you love. If shes not getting satisfied from you, she will find it somewhere else OR... she will be sad stuck in a relationship STARVING for sex and have pity on you. You can do so much without an erection. That's not the end all be all in orgasms for women. Trust me... You need to over compensate for problem. You can actually appear MORE manly by stepping up and making sure woman is satisfied. Don't let your bed be a graveyard.!!! I am pretty sure you can still have an orgasm without an erection.. if you have the right woman,... pleasure her. Do what it takes to help her orgasm... and then it's your turn. She will make sure you are pleased regardless if you are fully erected or squishy... Don't fret over this.. Seriously...!!! Don't feel like your manhood is any less... Rise up and serve and she will make you happy. Trust me!!
Occasional successful sexual function and early morning erections do not preclude the possibility of endocrine dysfunction. Since abnormally low levels of testosterone frequently are the primary cause of impotence, it is recommended that determination of the blood level of testosterone be an integral part of the total evaluation of the impotent patient.
In one study, 9.6% reported ‘occasional’ erectile dysfunction, 8.9% reported erectile dysfunction occurring ‘often’, and 18.6% reported erectile dysfunction occurring ‘all the time’. Of these, only 11.6% had received treatment.In another study, only 14.1% of men reported that they had received treatment, despite experiencing erectile dysfunction for longer than 12 months.
Davis Liu, MD is a board certified family physician, patient advocate, physician leader, blogger, and the author of two books, including The Thrifty Patient – Vital Insider Tips for Saving Money and Staying Healthy. He’s passionate about making healthcare more convenient, personalized, and affordable. Prior to joining, Dr. Liu was a practicing primary-care doctor for fifteen years at Kaiser Permanente in Roseville, California. He also served on the Permanente Medical Group (TPMG) Board of Directors as Vice Chair of the Finance and Audit committee and the Governance committee. Dr. Liu graduated summa cum laude and Phi Beta Kappa from the Wharton School of Business at the University of Pennsylvania. He received his medical degree from the University of Connecticut School of Medicine.
Martha K Terris, MD, FACS is a member of the following medical societies: American Cancer Society, American College of Surgeons, American Institute of Ultrasound in Medicine, American Society of Clinical Oncology, American Urological Association, Association of Women Surgeons, New York Academy of Sciences, Society of Government Service Urologists, Society of University Urologists, Society of Urology Chairpersons and Program Directors, and Society of Women in Urology
A lot of the time, the issue is a combination of both. For instance, cortisol – which is an important steroid hormone in the body – is released in greater amounts when we're stressed. It's supposed to briefly shut down non-essential functions like reproduction and fighting off illnesses whilst you deal with the danger at hand. However, the chronic and ongoing stress of modern life increases our background cortisol levels, activating the sympathetic system and stopping an erection.
Some men report being helped by an oral medication called yohimbine, which comes from the bark of a tree that grows in India and Africa. This drug, which needs to be taken every day, has been reported to help about 20 to 25 percent of the men taking it. A relatively new but widely used oral medication called Viagra requires a careful medical evaluation by your doctor.
To examine what is known about the demographics, etiology, risk factors, pathophysiology, diagnostic assessment, treatments (both generic and cause-specific), and the understanding of their consequences by the public and the medical community, the National Institute of Diabetes and Digestive and Kidney Diseases and the Office of Medical Applications of Research of the National Institutes of Health, in conjunction with the National Institute of Neurological Disorders and Stroke and the National Institute on Aging, convened a consensus development conference on male impotence on December 7-9, 1992. After 1 1/2 days of presentations by experts in the relevant fields involved with male sexual dysfunction and erectile impotence or dysfunction, a consensus panel comprised of representatives from urology, geriatrics, medicine, endocrinology, psychiatry, psychology, nursing, epidemiology, biostatistics, basic sciences, and the public considered the evidence and developed answers to the questions that follow.

The first line and by far the most common treatment today is with the prescription drug sildenafil citrate, sold under the brand name Viagra. An estimated 20 million prescriptions for the pill have been filled since it was approved by the FDA in March 1998. It is also the most effective treatment with a success rate of more than 60%. The drug boosts levels of a substance called cyclic GMP, which is responsible for widening the blood vessels of the penis. In clinical studies, Viagra produced headaches in 16% of men who took it, and other side effects included flushing, indigestion, and stuffy nose.
If you’re no longer having intercourse, you don’t need erections. Most men assume that erections are necessary for sex. No. Couples can have great sex without them. Intercourse becomes problematic for older couples. Men have erection issues and post-menopausal women develop vaginal dryness and atrophy that can make intercourse uncomfortable (or worse) even with lubricants. Many older couples jettison intercourse in favor of mutual massage, oral sex, and sex toys—and still enjoy hot sex.
Experts often treat psychologically based impotence using techniques that decrease anxiety associated with intercourse. The patient's partner can help apply the techniques, which include gradual development of intimacy and stimulation. Such techniques also can help relieve anxiety during treatment of physical impotence. If these simple behavioral methods at home are ineffective, a doctor may refer an individual to a sex counselor.

But if the blood flow is weak here, it is highly likely that it is also weak in arteries supplying the heart, raising the risk of a heart attack. In fact, some studies suggest that women with heart disease may also suffer sexual dysfunction: the clitoris, like the penis, is a vascular organ, and also relies on healthy blood flow for successful orgasms.


Psychotherapy and/or behavioral therapy may be useful for some patients with erectile dysfunction without obvious organic cause, and for their partners. These may also be used as an adjunct to other therapies directed at the treatment of organic erectile dysfunction. Outcome data from such therapy, however, have not been well-documented or quantified, and additional studies along these lines are indicated.


Following a detailed discussion about the history of erectile dysfunction and its risk factors, your doctor will examine the testicles and penis to help determine the cause of erectile dysfunction. Your doctor will check reflexes and pulses in the area to see if problems with blood vessels or nerves are contributing to the erectile dysfunction. If necessary, your doctor will order tests to help diagnose erectile dysfunction.

The availability of phosphodiesterase-5 (PDE5) inhibitors—sildenafil, vardenafil, tadalafil, and avanafil—has fundamentally altered the medical management of ED. In addition, direct-to-consumer marketing of these agents over the last 15 years has increased the general public’s awareness of ED as a medical condition with underlying causes and effective treatments.
It is important that physicians and other health care providers treating patients for chronic conditions periodically inquire into the sexual functioning of their patients and be prepared to offer counsel for those who experience erectile difficulties. Lack of sexual knowledge and anxiety about sexual performance are common contributing factors to erectile dysfunction. Education and reassurance may be helpful in preventing the cascade into serious erectile failure in individuals who experience minor erectile difficulty due to medications or common changes in erectile functioning associated with chronic illnesses or with aging.
In other cases, men who habitually use alcohol or other drugs may experience similar results. Alcohol is a depressant to the central nervous system. This means that a little bit might be able to lighten the mood, but too much can basically shut down all communication between the brain and the penis. When this happens, no amount of will or stimulation will result in an erection. Other drugs can also affect the body’s ability to achieve an erection, including heroin and MDMA, otherwise known as ecstasy.
The association between low testosterone and ED is not entirely clear. Although these 2 processes certainly overlap in some instances, they are distinct entities. Some 2-21% of men have both hypogonadism and ED; however, it is unclear to what degree treating the former will improve erectile function. [17] About 35-40% of men with low testosterone see an improvement in their erections with testosterone replacement; however, almost 65% of these men see no improvement. [15]

This penile tumescence monitor is placed at the base and near the corona of the penis. It is connected to a monitor that records a continuous graph depicting the force and duration of erections that occur during sleep. The monitor is strapped to the leg. The nocturnal penile tumescence test is conducted on several nights to obtain an accurate indication of erections that normally occur during the alpha phase of sleep.


Obviously, there are worse problems than a guy saying "I love you" too often, but if it's a problem, it sounds like the two of you need to have a long conversation. You need to understand why he likes to say it so much: Is it because he's insecure or hoping to comfort you or just breathlessly in love? (Or some combination of the three?) And he needs to understand how it makes you feel. So, if it really bothers you, tell him why.
Erectile dysfunction (ED), also known as impotence, is the inability to achieve or sustain a hard enough erection for satisfactory completion of sexual activity. Erectile dysfunction is different from other health conditions that interfere with male sexual function, such as lack of sexual desire (decreased libido) and problems with ejaculation release of the fluid from the penis (ejaculatory dysfunction) and orgasm/climax (orgasmic dysfunction), and penile curvature (Peyronie's disease), although these problems may also be present. ED affects about 50% of men age 40 and over. This article focuses on the evaluation and treatment of erectile dysfunction.

Trauma to the pelvic blood vessels or nerves can also lead result in ED. Bicycle riding for long periods has been implicated as an etiologic factor; direct compression of the perineum by the bicycle seat may cause vascular and nerve injury. [37] On the other hand, bicycling for less than 3 hours per week may be somewhat protective against ED. [37] Some of the newer bicycle seats have been designed to diminish pressure on the perineum. [37, 38]

The symptoms of erectile dysfunction include difficulty achieving an erection, trouble maintaining an erection, and a reduced interest in sex. Because male sexual arousal is a fairly complex process, it can sometimes be difficult to identify a specific cause. Arousal starts in the brain but it also involves the nerves, muscles, and blood vessels and can be impacted by hormones and emotions. If a problem develops with any of these things, erectile dysfunction could be the consequence.
Phosphodiesterase inhibitors: This class of medications includes sildenafil, tadalafil, and vardenafil. They work by inhibiting an enzyme called phosphodiesterase type 5 (PDE-5), allowing more blood to enter the penis and helping to produce an erection. These medications are often taken before sex and will cause an erection only when the man is sexually stimulated.
But he may have a real problem. Generally, erectile dysfunction is linked to cardiovascular health. If your guy has serious health problems, drinks and smokes too much, or does too many drugs, those conditions may play a role. Obesity, heart disease, prescription medications, and diabetes are just a few of the common risk factors. And then there are the psychological causes: depression, stress, and the million things flashing through his head when he's struggling to get it on.
But if the blood flow is weak here, it is highly likely that it is also weak in arteries supplying the heart, raising the risk of a heart attack. In fact, some studies suggest that women with heart disease may also suffer sexual dysfunction: the clitoris, like the penis, is a vascular organ, and also relies on healthy blood flow for successful orgasms.
The Cancer of the Prostate Strategic Urologic Research Endeavor (CaPSURE) study, designed to determine whether an individual man’s sexual outcomes after most common treatments for early-stage prostate cancer could be accurately predicted on the basis of baseline characteristics and treatment plans, found that 2 years after treatment, 177 (35%) of 511 men who underwent prostatectomy reported the ability to attain functional erections suitable for intercourse. [45]

About six months ago, I was talking to another guy (I have a boyfriend) online, and I ended up sending him a topless pic of me. I have been with my man for almost five years, and I feel so guilty and stupid for doing it — not only because I'm dating someone, but also because it's a stupid thing to do anyway. I love my man so much, and I don't know what to do.
Relationship problems can make it difficult for you to get or stay hard when you’re attempting to have sex with the person you’re in a relationship with. However, if you have this problem and you’re in a relationship that doesn’t mean your relationship is necessarily the reason. There are lots of other reasons you might not be able to get or stay hard (see above).
Look, ED can have many causes. Most of the time, it’s physiological. But there are also lots of psychological reasons why someone may experience ED. Treating ED isn’t all about medication. Dealing with some of these psychological issues can help you battle ED, too. I’m talking about depression, anxiety, loss of desire, sense of inadequacy, guilt, fatigue, anger, relationship dysfunction. Working through these types of psychological challenges can help you achieve the happy, healthy manhood you deserve.
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