So what can you do to help things along a little?  Well, chances are it may sort itself out as you settle in to your relationship. But if it keeps happening and you see a future in the relationship, you need to talk about it, or it will soon become the elephant in the bedroom. Pick a time with no distractions and where nobody can overhear you. Tell them that you care about them and that you don’t need to rush things sexually. This can take the pressure off the need to perform. 


The inflatable type of device consists of cylinders that are implanted in the corpora cavernosa, a fluid reservoir implanted in the abdomen, and a pump placed in the scrotum. The man squeezes the pump to move fluid into the cylinders and cause them to become rigid. (He reverses the process by squeezing the pump again.) While these devices allow for intermittent erections, they have a slightly higher malfunction rate than the silicon rods.
This is one of many types of constricting devices placed at the base of the penis to diminish venous outflow and improve the quality and duration of the erection. This is particularly useful in men who have a venous leak and are only able to obtain partial erections that they are unable to maintain. These constricting devices may be used in conjunction with oral agents, injection therapy, and vacuum devices.
Well, men go through the exact same anxieties, but the difference between men and women is the result is far more obvious in men. The first thing you need to do when you suspect your man is suffering from anxiety-induced erectile dysfunction is to look at him while you're going down on him and say this: "Is there anything you'd really like me to do? I'm willing to do whatever turns you on."
In some cases, nocturnal penile tumescence testing is performed to find out whether the man has erections while asleep. Healthy men usually have about four or five erections throughout the night. The man applies a device to the penis called a Rigiscan before going to bed at night, and the device can determine whether he has had erections. (If a man is able to have normal erections at night, this suggests a psychological cause for his impotence.)
Concerns that use of pornography can cause erectile dysfunction[14] have not been substantiated in epidemiological studies according to a 2015 literature review.[15] However, another review and case studies article maintains that use of pornography does indeed cause erectile dysfunction, and critiques the previously described literature review.[16]
Vijay Bhat, MD is a board certified internal medicine physician who is passionate about providing quality medical care that’s affordable for patients. He believes that integrating technology and medicine can make healthcare efficient and more accessible. Throughout his training Dr. Bhat was involved with global health initiatives, providing care to underprivileged communities locally and overseas. He’s also been a strong proponent of quality improvement in the medical field. Dr. Bhat graduated with a BS from the University of California Berkeley, and received his medical degree from Stony Brook University in New York. He completed his residency in Internal Medicine at Rutgers Robert Wood Johnson.
It is essential to discuss erectile dysfunction with your doctor, so any serious underlying causes can be excluded and treatment options can be discussed. Many men are embarrassed discussing this issue with their doctor, or even their partner. Open communication with your doctor, and in your relationship, is important for effectively managing this common problem.
The general medical history is important in identifying specific risk factors that may account for or contribute to the patient's erectile dysfunction. These include vascular risk factors such as hypertension, diabetes, smoking, coronary artery disease, peripheral vascular disorders, pelvic trauma or surgery, and blood lipid abnormalities. Decreased sexual desire or history suggesting a hypogonadal state could indicate a primary endocrine disorder. Neurologic causes may include a history of diabetes mellitus or alcoholism with associated peripheral neuropathy. Neurologic disorders such as multiple sclerosis, spinal injury, or cerebrovascular accidents are often obvious or well defined prior to presentation. It is essential to obtain a detailed medication and illicit drug history since an estimated 25 percent of cases of erectile dysfunction may be attributable to medications for other conditions. Past medical history can reveal important causes of erectile dysfunction, including radical pelvic surgery, radiation therapy, Peyronie's disease, penile or pelvic trauma, prostatitis, priapism, or voiding dysfunction. Information regarding prior evaluation or treatment for "impotence" should be obtained. A detailed sexual history, including current sexual techniques, is important in the general history obtained. It is also important to determine if there have been previous psychiatric illnesses such as depression or neuroses.
Stress is another factor that can be a cause or effect of ED. If you're stressed at work, at home, and in your relationships, it's going to take a toll on your sexual function. Your mind is elsewhere, and relaxing when you finally make it between the sheets is a long shot. Now you’re stressed because you can’t get it up (talk about the ultimate catch-22), so you're stuck in this sad, frustrating cycle. “ED really affects the psyche of a guy, regardless of the etiology, Gittens says. “If you have a problem getting an erection one night, you’re probably going to be anxious and worried your partner might see you as less of a man the next time you try to get an erection.” There's a pill that will help with this, and it's not promoted on television with middle-aged men in sports cars. It's a damn chill pill.
It is estimated that up to 20 million American men frequently suffer from impotence and that it strikes up to half of all men between the ages of 40 and 70. Doctors used to think that most cases of impotence were psychological in origin, but they now recognize that, at least in older men, physical causes may play a primary role in 60% or more of all cases. In men over the age of 60, the leading cause is atherosclerosis, or narrowing of the arteries, which can restrict the flow of blood to the penis. Injury or disease of the connective tissue, such as Peyronie's disease, may prevent the corpora cavernosa from completely expanding. Damage to the nerves of the penis, from certain types of surgery or neurological conditions, such as Parkinson's disease or multiple sclerosis, may also cause impotence. Men with diabetes are especially at risk for impotence because of their high risk of both atherosclerosis and a nerve disease called diabetic neuropathy.
Sexual functioning involves a complex interaction among biologic, sociocultural, and psychological factors, and the complexity of this interaction makes it difficult to ascertain the clinical etiology of sexual dysfunction. Before any diagnosis of sexual dysfunction is made, problems that are explained by a nonsexual mental disorder or other stressors must first be addressed. Thus, in addition to the criteria for erectile disorder, the following must be considered:
Six herbs for treating erectile dysfunction Erectile dysfunction can be an embarrassing condition that can leave men unable to achieve an erection or a full orgasm. This MNT Knowledge Center article talks about six different herbal supplements that could help people with erectile dysfunction, including ginkgo biloba, horny goat weed, and red ginseng. Read now
Risks associated with injection therapy including bleeding, pain with injection, penile pain, priapism, and corporal fibrosis (scarring inside of the corpora cavernosa). There is also concern that repetitive injections in the same area could cause scar tissue to build up in the tunica albuginea that could create penile curvature. Thus, doctors recommended that one alternate sides with injection and perform injections no more frequent than every other day.
Dr. Matthew Walvick, D.O. is a board certified Internal Medicine physician. He completed his undergraduate education at UCLA. He received his medical degree from Touro University College of Osteopathic Medicine in Vallejo, California. He completed his Internal Medicine residency at UCSF's Fresno Medical Education Program. Prior to joining Lemonaid Health, Dr. Walvick was a practicing primary care physician at John Muir Health and then doing house calls with the start-up Heal. Dr. Walvick is excited to be a part of the Lemonaid Health team making healthcare refreshingly simple.
Monitoring erections that occur during sleep (nocturnal penile tumescence) can help you and your doctor to understand if the erectile dysfunction is due to psychological or physical causes. The nocturnal penile tumescence test is a study to evaluate erections at night. Normally men have three to five erections per eight hours of sleep. The test can be performed at home or in a sleep lab. The most accurate way to perform the test involves a special device that is connected to two rings. The rings are placed around the penis, one at the tip of the penis and the other at the bottom (base) of the penis. The device records how many erections occur, how long they last, and how rigid they are. The test is limited in that it does not assess the ability to penetrate.
My boyfriend has a hard time getting and staying hard. It's obviously a difficult situation to talk about, but he says he feels pressure when he's with me (versus previous random hookups he wasn't invested in), so he psyches himself out. When we do have sex, I'm almost always really satisfied and I care a lot about him, both things I express in and outside of the bedroom. But the situation seems to be only getting worse. We've stopped having sex during the week because our busy lives mean we don't have an hour or more to devote to sex (which is sometimes what it takes), or we can't have sex at all because of what he's experiencing. I'm afraid this is going to continue to get worse, not only sexually but emotionally in our relationship. How can I help him fix this, and reassure him in the meantime that I care about him and want to support him?
In many cases, diagnosing erectile dysfunction requires little more than a physical exam and a review of your symptoms. If your doctor suspects that an underlying health problem may be at play, however, he may request additional testing. Once you’ve determined the cause for your ED, you and your doctor can decide on a form of treatment – here are some of the options:
So what do you do? If the guilt is too much, you can tell your boyfriend. It might be the only way to clear your conscience — and hopefully, if you explain the reasons why you did such a boneheaded thing, he'll understand. It will be hard and it may create drama for months to come, but my guess is that you can recover, if he's not a horribly jealous guy.
The link between chronic disease and ED is most striking for diabetes. Men who have diabetes are two to three times more likely to have erectile dysfunction than men who do not have diabetes. Among men with erectile dysfunction, those with diabetes may experience the problem as much as 10 to 15 years earlier than men without diabetes. Yet evidence shows that good blood sugar control can minimize this risk. Other conditions that may cause ED include cardiovascular disease, atherosclerosis (hardening of the arteries), kidney disease, and multiple sclerosis. These illnesses can impair blood flow or nerve impulses throughout the body.
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