In other words, there are dozens of reasons he might not be getting it up, which have absolutely nothing to do with your relationship. Honestly, there's just no way for me to give you specific advice here. If it's a serious problem, you should encourage him to check in with his primary care physician first, and then, perhaps, a therapist, in the nicest way possible.
Defined as experiencing difficulty having an erection at least 50 percent of the time, about 30 million men in the U.S. suffer from erectile dysfunction (ED), according to the National Institutes of Health. So, if odds are pretty good you’ll experience a failure to launch at some point in your life, take solace in this finding from the University of Adelaide: You can reverse ED by focusing on lifestyle factors, not just popping a blue pill.
Sildenafil (Viagra) was the first oral phosphodiesterase type 5 (PDE5) inhibitor approved by the FDA in the United States for the treatment of erectile dysfunction (it is not approved for women). Sildenafil inhibits PDE5, which is an enzyme that destroys cGMP. By inhibiting the destruction of cGMP by PDE5, sildenafil allows cGMP to accumulate. The cGMP in turn prolongs relaxation of the smooth muscle of the corpora cavernosa. Relaxation of the corpora cavernosa smooth muscle allows blood to flow into the penis resulting in increased engorgement of the penis. In short, sildenafil increases blood flow into the penis and decreases blood flow out of the penis.
The first stem cell study for the treatment of ED was published in 2004. This study used embryonic stem cells to treat ED. At this time, there is a total of 36 published basic studies assessing stem cell therapy for ED, with two clinical trials. The mechanism of action of stem cells is to generate angiogenesis with subsequent increase in cavernosal smooth muscle cells within the corporal bodies.46
There are, as you listen to all of the advertisements, if your erection lasts for more than four hours, there are very, very unusual cases where that can happen. There are very rare cases of visual problems. There are even rarer cases of hearing problems. But with every medication, there always a potential downside. But the absolute contraindication is an unstable medical condition, an unstable cardiovascular condition, being on nitrates.

Chlamydia and erectile dysfunction: What's the link? Some people who have chlamydia also experience erectile dysfunction (ED), which involves problems getting or maintaining an erection. Chlamydia can infect the prostate gland, leading to prostatitis, pain, and ED. In this article, learn more about the link between this common infection and ED, and treatments for both. Read now

Picture the scene. You get home from the bar with your date. You both decided to leave a little early, after only two drinks, because the chemistry was really there and both of you wanted to cut to the chase and get intimate. To discover each other's bodies. To eat of the fruits of passion. In short, to have sex. You stick the key in the lock, swing the door open, and invite her into your beautiful place. OK, well it might not be exactly beautiful. It might be a bit of a mess, frankly. But you don't let that ruin the moment. You turn around and passionately kiss her. How the two of you make it to your bedroom with some clothing still on is anybody's guess. You jump on the bed and hurriedly strip. God — can't this go any faster, you wonder? 

Since you’re the talker, this is an argument that you’re going to have to win. Really let him know that you feel insecure and unloved when he doesn’t say “I love you.” Tell him it makes you worry about how he really feels when he doesn’t say anything. Tell him that it hurts you that he won’t step the slightest bit out of his comfort zone to say three words that would make you feel so much better. Let him know this doesn’t mean he has to suddenly get all lovey-dovey and give you a cheesy nickname and lay on the sugar so sweet your teeth rot, you adorable little honeybee — because then you might both puke. (I just threw up a little in my mouth myself while typing that.) But that’s not what you’re asking. Let him know you just want an “I love you” now and then. That’s not unreasonable. He doesn’t have to go overboard and you may not get the constant affirmation you prefer — but you can both compromise.


More recent estimates suggest that the number of U.S. men with erectile dysfunction may more likely be near 10-20 million. Inclusion of individuals with partial erectile dysfunction increases the estimate to about 30 million. The majority of these individuals will be older than 65 years of age. The prevalence of erectile dysfunction has been found to be associated with age. A prevalence of about 5 percent is observed at age 40, increasing to 15-25 percent at age 65 and older. One-third of older men receiving medical care at a Department of Veterans' Affairs ambulatory clinic admitted to problems with erectile function.

Injection of vasodilator substances into the corpora of the penis has provided a new therapeutic technique for a variety of causes of erectile dysfunction. The most effective and well-studied agents are papaverine, phentolamine, and prostaglandin E[sub 1]. These have been used either singly or in combination. Use of these agents occasionally causes priapism (inappropriately persistent erections). This appears to have been seen most commonly with papaverine. Priapism is treated with adrenergic agents, which can cause life-threatening hypertension in patients receiving monoamine oxidase inhibitors. Use of the penile vasodilators also can be problematic in patients who cannot tolerate transient hypotension, those with severe psychiatric disease, those with poor manual dexterity, those with poor vision, and those receiving anticoagulant therapy. Liver function tests should be obtained in those being treated with papaverine alone. Prostaglandin E[sub 1] can be used together with papaverine and phentolamine to decrease the incidence of side effects such as pain, penile corporal fibrosis, fibrotic nodules, hypotension, and priapism. Further study of the efficacy of multitherapy versus monotherapy and of the relative complications and safety of each approach is indicated. Although these agents have not received FDA approval for this indication, they are in widespread clinical use. Patients treated with these agents should give full informed consent. There is a high rate of patient dropout, often early in the treatment. Whether this is related to side effects, lack of spontaneity in sexual relations, or general loss of interest is unclear. Patient education and followup support might improve compliance and lessen the dropout rate. However, the reasons for the high dropout rate need to be determined and quantified.


While studies are limited, it has been shown that male sexual dysfunction can also negatively impact the sexual function of female partners. A study comparing the sexual function of women with partners with erectile dysfunction to those without showed that sexual arousal, lubrication, orgasm, satisfaction, pain and total score were significantly lower in those who had partners with erectile dysfunction. Later in that study, a large proportion of the men with erectile dysfunction underwent treatment. Following treatment, sexual arousal, lubrication, orgasm, satisfaction and pain were all significantly increased. It was concluded that female sexual function is impacted by male erection status, which may improve following treatment of male sexual dysfunction.
The laboratory results should be discussed with the patient and, if possible, with his sexual partner. This educational process allows a review of the basic aspects of the anatomy and physiology of the sexual response and an explanation of the possible etiology and associated risk factors (eg, smoking and the use of various medications). Treatment options and their benefits and risks should be discussed. This type of dialogue allows the patient and physician to cooperate in developing an optimal management strategy.
Arterial revascularization procedures have a very limited role (e.g., in congenital or traumatic vascular abnormality) and probably should be restricted to the clinical investigation setting in medical centers with experienced personnel. All patients who are considered for vascular surgical therapy need to have appropriate preoperative evaluation, which may include dynamic infusion pharmaco-cavernosometry and cavernosography (DICC), duplex ultrasonography, and possibly arteriography. The indications for and interpretations of these diagnostic procedures are incompletely standardized; therefore, difficulties persist with using these techniques to predict and assess the success of surgical therapy, and further investigation to clarify their value and role in this regard is indicated.
The user should stop using the vacuum pump if pain occurs... Use of a vacuum pump may bruise or rupture the blood vessels either immediately below the surface of the skin or within the deep structures of the penis or scrotum, resulting in hemorrhage and/or the formation of a hematoma. There is now sufficient information available regarding the risks, benefits, and use of vacuum pumps.

A good indicator that "everything is in working order" and that it is probably a psychological cause is if a “morning erection” is still experienced. Feelings like fear, anger, distress and anxiety cause part of the nervous system to come into play which directly blocks the action of another part of the system involved in creating an erection. This is a natural reaction – our ancestors would find it more difficult to run from a predator with an erection in the way!

Occasional successful sexual function and early morning erections do not preclude the possibility of endocrine dysfunction. Since abnormally low levels of testosterone frequently are the primary cause of impotence, it is recommended that determination of the blood level of testosterone be an integral part of the total evaluation of the impotent patient.
The Latin term impotentia coeundi describes simple inability to insert the penis into the vagina; it is now mostly replaced by more precise terms, such as erectile dysfunction (ED). The study of erectile dysfunction within medicine is covered by andrology, a sub-field within urology. Research indicates that erectile dysfunction is common, and it is suggested that approximately 40% of males with erectile dysfunction or impotence, at least occasionally.[35] The condition is also on occasion called phallic impotence.[36] Its antonym or opposite condition is priapism.[37][38]

There are hundreds of medications that have the side effect of ED and/or decreased libido. Examples of drugs implicated as a cause of ED include hydrochlorothiazides and beta-blocking agents. Medications used to treat depression, particularly the SSRIs such as citalopram (Celexa), escitalopram (Lexapro), fluoxetine (Prozac, Prozac Weekly, Sarafem), fluvoxamine (Luvox, Luvox CR), paroxetine (Paxil, Paxil CR, Pexeva) and sertraline (Zoloft), may also contribute to ED.9 Bupropion (Wellbutrin) which has a predominant effect on blocking the reuptake of dopamine is an antidepressant with lower incidence of ED.10 The side effects of 5ARIs occurring in fewer than 5% of patients can include gynaecomastia, ED, loss of libido and ejaculatory dysfunction.11


Medications: Many common medicines produce erectile dysfunction as a side effect. Medicines that can cause erectile dysfunction include many used to treat high blood pressure, antihistamines, antidepressants, tranquilizers, and appetite suppressants. Examples of common medicines that can cause erectile dysfunction include propranolol (Inderal) or other beta-blockers, hydrochlorothiazide, digoxin (Lanoxin), amitriptyline (Elavil), famotidine (Pepcid), cimetidine (Tagamet), metoclopramide (Reglan), naproxen, indomethacin (Indocin), lithium (Eskalith, Lithobid), verapamil (Calan, Verelan, Isoptin), phenytoin (Dilantin), gemfibrozil (Lopid), amphetamine/dextroamphetamine (Adderall), and phentermine. Prostate cancer medications that lower testosterone levels such as leuprolide (Lupron) may affect erectile function. Some chemotherapies such as cyclophosphamide (Cytoxan) may affect erectile function.

The vacuum device creates a vacuum to pull blood into the penis. Unlike a normal erection, the inflow of blood does not continue once the individual removes the vacuum device. The rubber band placed at the base of the penis constricts the penis to prevent the blood from leaving the penis. As there is no inflow or outflow of blood when the rubber band is in place, it is uncommon for the tip of the penis (the glans) to appear a little blue and the penis to be cooler. Once intercourse is completed, the individual removes the rubber band and the blood drains out of the penis.

This may be the oldest excuse in the book as a reason not to have safe sex, but research has confirmed that condoms may interfere with some men’s ability to have and hold an erection. For example, a 2006 study found that, over a three-month period, about 37 percent of men lost at least one erection when putting on a condom, or during sex with a condom, SexualHealth.com reported.
Unfortunately, some patients may have an overly simplified understanding of the role of PDE5 inhibitors in ED management. Such patients may not expect or be willing to undergo a long evaluation and testing process to obtain a better understanding of their sexual problem, and they may be less likely to involve their partner in discussing their sexual relationship with the physician. They may expect to obtain medications through a phone call to their doctor or even over the Internet, with minimal or no physician contact at all.

Because adequate arterial supply is critical for erection, any disorder that impairs blood flow may be implicated in the etiology of erectile failure. Most of the medical disorders associated with erectile dysfunction appear to affect the arterial system. Some disorders may interfere with the corporal veno-occlusive mechanism and result in failure to trap blood within the penis, or produce leakage such that an erection cannot be maintained or is easily lost.
Sexual dysfunction is highly prevalent in men and women. In the MMAS, 52% of the respondents reported some degree of erectile difficulty. Complete ED, defined as (1) the total inability to obtain or maintain an erection during sexual stimulation and (2) the absence of nocturnal erections, occurred in 10% of the respondents. Mild and moderate ED occurred in 17% and 25% of responders, respectively. [15]
All studies demonstrate a strong association with age, even when data are adjusted for the confounding effects of other risk factors. The independent association with aging suggests that vascular changes in the arteries and sinusoids of the corpora cavernosa, similar to those found elsewhere in the body, are contributing factors. Other risk factors associated with aging include depression, sleep apnea, and low HDL levels.
Before delving into the causes and solutions to erectile dysfunction, it’s first important to understand how erections work. The penis is mostly comprised or fibrous tissue that fills with blood upon arousal. This is what causes an erection, and after arousal is finished, blood drains back out into the body and the penis becomes flaccid. Men can have erections for no discernible reason throughout the day, but when sexual stimulation occurs, rather through contact, visual, audible, or mental stimulation, the potential for achieving an erection increases.
Cause-specific assessment and treatment of male sexual dysfunction will require recognition by the public and the medical community that erectile dysfunction is a part of overall male sexual dysfunction. The multifactorial nature of erectile dysfunction, comprising both organic and psychologic aspects, may often require a multidisciplinary approach to its assessment and treatment. This consensus report addresses these issues, not only as isolated health problems but also in the context of societal and individual perceptions and expectations.
Whenever I am prescribing a medication to a patient, I’m always asking myself, what can the patient do before requiring the medication? What changes do they have to make in order to reduce the amount of medication or preclude their even needing it? So a good candidate is somebody who has an understanding of a healthy lifestyle, about physical activity, about sleep, about nutrition, alcohol, smoking. So patients, individuals, have to do their share before they’re a candidate for anything. All right?
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